See this is what really happened
by DoILookLikeAManWithAPlan
Summary: A series of drabbles between Donny and Aldo, maybe more of the Basterds. Rating may go higher.
1. King of Fast Forward

**King of Living Fast Forward**

**Movie:**Inglourious Basterds (2009)

**Plot:**Donny Donowitz has been living in the year 2006 for a while because of a freak accident. A country song hits his ears and almost immediately reminds him of one Aldo Raine.

**Disclaimer:**I do not own "Inglourious Basterds" If I did, every Basterd would've lived.

**2006**

The Bear Jew picked up the baseball bat that sat there beside the front door of his apartment. He gripped the handle of it. Donny Donowitz walked outside, knowing that if he didn't show up, the kids that he promised to play ball with would be disappointed. The young boys were already in the streets of the neighborhood. They had made a makeshift baseball diamond right on the street.

It brought a smile to the Bear Jew's face. At least there were still kids in the year 2006 that would pick up a baseball bat. Maybe not for what he wanted to do, which was smash in people's heads. But at least they were picking them. When the Jewish male found himself actually listening to the song, a flashback to when he was in his actual time occurred to him.

**1941**

"Nazi ain't got no humanity. They need to be destroyed. That's why when we find ones in the Nazi in uniform, they will die," Lt. Aldo Raine said as he paced back and forth in front of his men.

"There's a Jew that I've heard about. The Nazi's call them the Bear Jew," one of his men mentioned to him.

"Let's go find this Bear Jew. We'll need him on our team," Aldo said flashing a big grin.

**2006**

"Hey mister. You're supposed to be playing with us," a young voice piped up.

"Sorry," Donny mumbled as he tossed the ball a bit at the child in front of him.

He was still kneeling down, but had moved back. One of the young boys had given him a ball cap to wear, just so he could be one of them. It had brought a small smile to his face. The full grown man had it twisted off to where the bill was on the left side of his head. He smiled even more when the kid bunted the ball.

**1941**

"We need your expertise in killing Nazi's Mr. Donowitz," Raine said just before a gun shot sounded through the make shift jail the Nazi's had built to keep in their prisoner. "Goddammnit."

Donny looked up at the group of misfit Nazi killers. He had a blank look on his face before he stood up. He walked to the jail cells that he was trapped behind. He gripped onto one with one of his hands.

"As long as I get a baseball bat," he said. "And out of here."

"We can do that," the non-Jewish man said smirking as he made one of the others pick the lock on the gates.

Donny let go of the bars just as the door was let open. In the brief second that he took one step forward, he was faced with a bright white light. It was strange to him because it wasn't that bright in the underground tunnel that he had been in.

**In between times**

Donny stood there, not moving. He didn't even think he was breathing. He might as well been dead in the sort of limbo he was in. His last sight was Lt. Aldo Raine; Aldo the Apache. He hadn't known the other male that much. But he had heard rumors just like the other male had heard rumors of the Bear Jew.

**2006**

When Donny had come to once again, he was lying in the middle of the street. A bunch of kids were standing around him. One kid was defiantly too close to him.

"Hey kid. Get away from before I bash your head in with one of these baseball bats."


	2. Internet Comes A Reality Check

**Internet Comes A Reality Check**

**Movie:**Inglourious Basterds

**Plot:**Aldo and Donny try to figure out AOL. The two don't have a clue, so they call in a favor from the Navy's problem solvers...

**2011**

The dial-up tone was sounded through Aldo Raine's house. The Apache raised an eyebrow when a feminine voice sounded, "You got mail." He poked his head into the room where he left Donny in.

"You going to go out to check the mailbox?" Aldo asked.

"Guess I have to. Cuz the damned thing isn't opening for me," the Bear Jew said, groping for his baseball bat.

Aldo raised an eyebrow. The lieutenant didn't quite figure out what the sergeant was going to do. Then it dawned on him. Donny Donowitz was going to smash the computer into little bits of nothing. Aldo rushed into the computer room, grabbing the bat before Donny could do anything with it.

"Fuck a duck man!" Donny yelled twirling around in the chair.

He stared at the higher ranking man. Red painted his face from the anger that he was feeling. The Bear Jew just wanted to beat the piece of machinery, or at least harm it in some way with his bat. But alas his plan was foiled.

"I know some people that might just be able to help us," Aldo said, shrugging as he picked up the land line telephone they had. "Now log the fuck off Donny."

Donny mumbled something unintelligible under his breath, but did so unwillingly. He had heard from someone that he could find naked women on the Internet. He was just going to make sure there was such a thing that could be viewed. Aldo punched the numbers into the phone, letting the dial tone ring for a minute.

After a few minutes, they finally got all their problems solved and Donny got his answer to the naked women.

"We're getting in way over our heads in this decade," Donny said slumping into his chair.

**A/N:**Sorry for the rushed answer. Just didn't want to give away too much info.


End file.
